Stripped from the bowels of my friends' Facebook posts and other insanity that comes out of my head

Saturday, April 23, 2016

Kitchen Hint - Sculpture

Why spend large amounts of cash (that you can use on purses and shoes) on those fancy shmancy sculptures and vases with random sticks and weeds in them when you can use common household items to create that perfect artsy display.

Use contrasting colors and shapes to create that "one-of-a-kind" masterpiece, great for parties, and social gatherings.

Friday, April 22, 2016

Helpful Tip - Folding a Fitted Sheet

Hello everyone, it's time for another helpful tip!

You've probably seen all of the videos where smarmy people demonstrate how to fold a fitted sheet.

I'm not going to bore you with a video, mainly because my husband is currently napping and won't hold my cell phone while I fold a fitted sheet, so I'll just describe the process to you in these minor steps.

Anyone can do this, don't let those pompous know-it-alls in the videos make you feel little or inadequate... screw them, who do they think they are anyway!!!

Step 1: Pull the fitted sheet from the dryer.  Typically it is all bunched up, wrapped among itself in a ball, and probably still wet in the middle.

That's it!  Shove it in a drawer!

Use your appliances as they were made to work... and folding a fitted sheet is one of their jobs, not yours.

Now go have a glass of wine, job well done!

My Helpful Tips

One of the things I like about Feedly is that if you run out of blogs you follow, they have suggestions with all sorts of topics.

I made the mistake of hitting some of the "design" and "fashion" blogs and was astounded... ASTOUNDED at the number of followers some of these blogs have, that appear to be manned by either robots, or pretentious people who just found out that you can hang a towel rack on a door to save space and have taken black and white snooty pictures of their handy work.

So, to get more followers, I'm going to start providing "tips" to every day people.  You know, people like you and me who don't have the time, PTO, money, or willpower to jet off to fabulous foreign countries while carrying your Prada bag and wearing designer clothes.

I would link to some of these pompous blogs if it wasn't for the fear of being sued because then I'll never get to jet off to the Turks and Caicos with my Target skinny jeans and thrift store t-shirt.  Full disclosure: I do haul around a Longchamp Le Pliage but only because I can cram everything I own into it, including a donut and sandwich, some tupperware containers, probably a crock pot, and cleanup is a breeze.

So, after a whirlwind shopping trip, you'll be more interested in checking out your swag than taking out the trash, so utilizing your chest freezer as your temporary (or longer) storage facility for all of those Prime boxes is a no-brainer.

The trash guy only comes once a week, so there's no hurry getting that stuff out to the curb, besides, you may be able to repurpose those boxes for a fantastic... place to shove more crap you find to throw away but can't be bothered by walking downstairs and tossing it into the trash can... I mean recycling can, because EARTH and all that.

Do you have a pesky drain pipe and corrugated plastic drain pipe thing that takes the water away from your foundation?  I know these have real names, but I can't be bothered to Google them at the moment.

Don't you hate when that plastic pipe thing falls off the gutter whatever and water goes everywhere?  Yep, me too.  I'm pretty sure you can secure them both together with something, but why do that when you can take this fabulous deck planter and use it as a support!

Using the deck planter gives you a stunning, matched support structure that keeps that pipe up there and saves you from using your steam cleaner to suck up all the water that leaks into your foundation (or so I've heard).  It was almost as if it was created just to do that!

That's it for today!  Next time I'll show you how you can put screen up using Gorilla tape and how to paint your decaying mailbox pole!